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Translation, Per My Favorite Nine-Year-Old

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Neighbor Kid: “Um.. How do you say Nata’s name in your language?”

Me: Umm… what do mean?

What does he mean? English? Portuguese? Proto-Indo-European? Fart language? I might be able to deliver if it’s Fart Language.

Tryptic of Nata the Cat

That's my Nata! Has no clue he's a linguistic mess.

NK: Italian or whatever.

Me: Well, his name is ALREADY in Portuguese.

NK looks at me blankly. NK: But what’s his NAME in PORTUGUESE???

Me: Nata.

NK: NO IN PORTUGUESE!!

ME: Nata.

NK: NO I mean, how do you say it in your language?

ME: Nata.

NK: NO YOUR LANGUAGE!!

ME: You mean, like, ENGLISH???

Because English, really, let’s be frank, is MY language. I may be a practically monolingual whore, but….. I’m honest!

NK: NOOOOOOOO! In YOUR language!!!

ME: Well, it does mean “Cream” in English.

NK screams “CREAMMMMMMM!”

The damn cat doesn’t even look up.

About A. Savage Ross

I used to know as many Portuguese words as I knew English words. This was long before I knew words like "ephemeral" and "fleeting" and "gripping self-consciousness." Fast forward a few decades (and ill-fated classes) I am trying to learn how to string actual Portuguese sentences together and sound like an intelligent person.

2 responses »

  1. r u feeding kitteh mrshmllws?

    Reply
  2. Kitteh likks mrshmllws, buh duzzn’t eet em!! Slerp Slerp!

    Reply

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